The Days Are Long But the Decades Are Short

The Days Are Long But the Decades Are Short. An essay by Sam Altman, from April 2015.

People first

When Sam Altman turned thirty, a friend asked which lessons from his twenties were worth passing on. This list was his answer.

First, people. Keep family, friends and partner near the top, and prefer a few close friends to a hundred acquaintances.

Keep old friends. Throw parties. And now and then, stay up talking until sunrise.

This is probably it

Next: life is short. In Altman's view, this isn't a practice run; it's probably the only one.

Time is short and fast, and few are remembered for long. So do what fulfills you, not what others want.

Drop people you don't like, keep negativity out, and stop inventing reasons not to do what you want.

Choosing the work

For success, start by picking the right thing to work on. It matters most, yet most people skip it; original thinking is hard.

Then: focus, believe in yourself when others doubt you, build relationships, learn to spot talent, and work hard.

Great work is hard in a job you don't care about. Work very hard, but leave room for the rest of life.

Aim to be world-class; fall short, and you still land well. Take career risks early, and pick your field on purpose.

Money buys freedom

On money: whether or not it buys happiness, it buys freedom. And having too little is very stressful.

The surprise: not worrying about rent does more for your wellbeing than being able to buy your own jet.

Earning is often more fun than spending, yet he never regrets spending on friends, experiences, travel, saved time, or good causes.

Beyond money: talk more, read long things over tweets, watch less TV, and guard your time; most people squander it.

Goals, and chances

Don't get pushed around. Paul Graham once told him anyone might turn formidable; you can't tell who. Be confident, not arrogant.

Set clear goals for every day, every year, and every decade.

But if a great opportunity shows up, take it, even if it's a bit reckless. Hard work brings chances; seizing them is on you.

What surrounds you

Be around smart, interesting, ambitious people; hire them, work for them. You tend to become the average of who you're around most.

Clear out the small distractions that eat your attention. Altman thinks this matters hugely, and most people are bad at it.

Keep your personal burn rate low; that alone opens doors. And, short and sweet: summers are the best.

Fear less, regret less

Don't worry so much; things are rarely as risky as they look. Most people are too cautious, so advice leans too safe.

Ask for what you want. If you'd likely regret not doing something, do it. We regret what we didn't do far more.

When in doubt, he says, go ahead and kiss them.

Move, eat well, sleep, get outdoors. Help people when you can, and be kind to strangers, even when it doesn't matter.

Stay young

Youth is a gift; don't waste it. In your twenties, he thinks, some looseness with money is fine. Money can't buy back time.

Tell your parents you love them, and say it often. Go home when you can. This too shall pass. And learn hungrily.

Do new things often. Novelty seems to slow time, lift your mood, and keep your mind flexible. Try something big and risky each year.

Remember how hard you fell in love as a teenager, how excited you got as a kid? Feel that way now.

Character

Don't cheat people, and don't burn bridges; choose your fights with care. And forgive people.

Don't chase status. Without substance, it doesn't last, and it doesn't satisfy.

Most things are fine in moderation. Almost nothing is fine in extreme amounts.

Perspective

Existential angst is part of life, especially after big milestones and for ambitious people. If you feel it, nothing is wrong with you.

Be grateful, and keep problems in proportion. Don't complain much, or resent others' success. Be a doer, not a talker.

People adapt to almost anything, given time. Pause before you act, longer when angry. Don't judge fast: you never know their story.

And his last lesson is the title. Altman's line: “The days are long but the decades are short.”

In short

Put people first, and keep old friends close.

Choose work you care about, and aim high.

Guard your freedom and attention.

Worry less, try new things, be kind. The decades go fast.

The original is short, and better than this. Read it: blog.samaltman.com/the-days-are-long-but-the-decades-are-short